All About Timing – Ace

February 21, 2007, 4:07 am
Filed under: ace

so last night i was playing nba live 2006 when my friend passed this message through msn.

‘friend’: I’M GETTING MARRIED!!!

unfortunately for her… or me (however you wanna look at it) i was so involved in the game that i didn’t get the msg until an hour later… when someone else was like… DUDE ____’s getting MARRIED!!! i was like… whoa what? why didn’t she tell me? and low and behold… there it was. at first i was a little shocked, and then i was overcome with this incredible happiness b/c oh my goodness… SHE’S GETTING MARRIED!

and so we were giddily messaging each other, and then she logged off and i was talking to another friend and some very interesting questions were brought up….

is it too early? are they ready? etc etc.

what exactly is too soon anyways? i mean, is there a set time frame where it is no longer ‘too soon?’ and as soon as its no longer too soon… when is it ‘too long?’ i’ve had friends get married at 18… my best friend from high school was engaged at 19… and i also have friends who have been dating for, well… longer than the duration of most marriages. what’s the norm when it comes to something like this?

i guess its something that’ll never really be answered but here’s ACE’S TIMEFRAME for when to tie the knot.

when the following still happens… its still too soon:
- you look at her, and all you see are roses, other pretty flowers, and more roses..
- words like ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ are still a part of your daily exchange
- washing the dishes are ‘a joy’
- the words ‘no honey, that dress looks…. good on you’ are still coming from your mouth
- walking her home in the subarctic kingston winter is ‘your pleasure’
- you’re digging her baby fat
- you actually wear what she buys you

there are so many more… but i think for the sake of my own sanity and the few remaining friendships i do have… i’ll stop here.

now… when the following happens… you should’ve been married last year…
- you look at her, and all you see is your chef and laundry girl
- words like ‘shut up’ and ‘SHUT THE FRICK UP’ are a part of your daily exchange
- you use plastic cutlery b/c she’ll make you do the dishes of there are… dishes
- you always have $10 in your wallet so that no matter where you are, she can cab home.
- you’ve signed her up for weight watchers

yes yes i know i know… i’m not really leaving a lot of room to maneuver… b/c it only seems like there’s a 3 day window where you have to propose… or else you fall into the latter group. but not really. i believe that you can stay in the ‘right’ time for… ever.

now… when the following happens… you know that you’re ready.
- you look at her, and you see every flaw about her, and yet… you love
- you’re still have that $10 in your wallet, but you’ll never use it
- you go to the gym with her… or just buy a bowflex =)
- and most importnatly, in spite of the nagging, whining, complaining, dramaqueen-esque exchanges, when you can wake up in the morning, and you are thankful that you have her… then its real. and you’re ready.